


DILF problems

by adiosnoninos



Series: 99 problems and Taeil is all of them [1]
Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Humor, M/M, i wrote this at 3am instead of the class AV script, overuse of the word DILF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:02:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28009674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adiosnoninos/pseuds/adiosnoninos
Summary: "Tell me something I didn't know.""Taeil-hyung is a DILF hunter." The younger answered nonchalantly like he didn't drop the biggest bomb in the room.
Relationships: Moon Taeil/Qian Kun
Series: 99 problems and Taeil is all of them [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2073645
Comments: 7
Kudos: 72





	DILF problems

**Author's Note:**

> what is better than dilf kun? dilf hunter taeil and dilf kun

"Tell me something I didn't know."

Sicheng did not look up from his phone. Kun huffed, sinking back down on the sofa. So much for trying to entertain himself. He was sipping on his drink when Sicheng finally answered back.

"Taeil-hyung is a DILF hunter." The younger answered nonchalantly like he didn't drop the biggest bomb in the room.

Kun choked on his drink. Chenle's eyes went wide and he stared off into space in shock. 

Now _that_ is TMI.

Okay now here's a thing: The sky is blue. The water is wet. This massive project has 23 people involved in it. Kun likes Taeil.

What started as a puppy crush in their trainee days grew into a full-blown pining and yearning. Something that their fans write about.

But Kun, bless his gay little heart, can't go within five meters of Taeil without his heart going 100 miles per hour and making him forget every Korean word he learned within the last five years. His MBTI told him he's an extrovert yet he can't even bear to talk more than five sentences to the older and most of the time it's the most mundane things like if they have eaten yet.

He also vividly remembered being dragged along by Chenle because his friends in 127 wanted to eat something. Kun ended up paying for the meal and the sparkly eyes Taeil gave him were so worth it.

Don't blame him. He's a weak, _ weak _ man.

Once he's done coughing, he turned towards Sicheng with a glare. "What does hyung have to do with this?"

Sicheng raises his arms in exasperation "Oh my God not you too! I'm done!" He left the room, grumbling something about dense people.

Kun and Chenle shared a look. What the fuck does that mean then?!

-

Soon, Kun was called back as they were about to resume filming.

When he stepped back in, his soul instantly left his body.

Taeil is lounging in one of the chairs, playing something on his phone. Everyone is wearing the same thing yet Taeil looks like he was already shooting.

Kun swallows a lump in his throat as he takes in the view in front of him.

The shade of blue looks so heavenly on him. After months of getting used to seeing Taeil not wearing pants that fit him, these pants are a blessing and a sin itself. The fabric is stretched in the right places, emphasizing his  _ great  _ legs.

The gold jewelry was a nice touch and it complimented the entire outfit, his hair is messily styled to add to the look.

The view is fantastic. The stylists should get a raise for blessing his eyes.

"Close your mouth Kun-ge, your crush will notice."

Kun snapped out of his stupor to see Jeno snickering beside him. 

"Was it too obvious?! Oh my God, I embarrassed myself he's never going to look at my way ever again!" He panics. He didn’t know how long he stood there, gawking like a fool.

  
  


"Whoa calm down, he looks like he's still hooked on Kart Rider. I think you're doing fine." Jeno told him, a mischievous glint in his eyes. When Taeil suddenly sits up to fix his sitting position and Kun sees those thigh muscles flex, he wants to cry right there.

God, the men You put on Earth are going to kill him someday.

When the director called them all to start filming, Taeil shot him a smile and wished him good luck.

It's going to be a long day for him.

-

"When the director told hyung to put one arm on my shoulder, I wanted to start crying right there. Then hyung suddenly breaks into laughter and what does my dumb, gay ass do? Of course, I fucking laughed along and the managers got that on camera!" Kun hits his head on the table, hoping that he can beat the stupid out of him.

Lucas pats his back. "There there there, it's okay to be uncool sometimes."

  
  
  


"Fuck you Lucas you didn't have to pine before you dated Hendery!"

Hendery makes an offended noise. "It's because I was the one pining! Lucas has his shit together!"

Kun groans. He's going to be stuck in this long cycle of pining because his crush is probably into older people. Someone like Yunho from TVXQ.

He starts hitting his head on the desk again. There is no way he's winning.

Kun wasn’t sure how he survived that earlier. Taeil was very touchy and constantly glanced in his direction. There is this song that goes _"Every time we touch I get this feeling"_ and it's described him so well right now. It was like the first shot of soju and it sent him spiralling.

The director’s instructions was they have to look as cool as possible. ”A little bit sexy,” he added. When it was time to film both of them, Taeil leaned in so close he could smell the faint, flowery scent. He tried not to sniff but the scent got his head up in the clouds.

How does one try to be sexy when their own crush is beside him, being effortlessly sexy. He needed a new word for sexy because at this rate he’ll wear it out.

The Moon Taeil Experience everyone! Exclusive to members of NCT only!

"Gege, if it helps, I think Sicheng isn't serious about it." Lucas tried to comfort him. 

"But Lucas," he whined "Taeil is out of my league!"

Aside from being ridiculously hot even if he's doing nothing, Kun instantly fell for him after their first encounter. 

Taeil tried to introduce himself in his very limited Chinese and stumbled a lot but Kun found it endearing. He also shared a vocal class with Taeil and he was a goner the moment Taeil started singing.

Like Kun, Taeil used to attend a university. When he found out that Taeil only applied to two schools because he was confident he would get in either of them, Kun thought it was incredibly sexy of him.

He's also very kind and enjoyed doting on his dongsaengs. Taeil indulged the younger ones' whims. He rarely used his hyung privilege on anyone. He also gave him advice on how to sing better and Kun was grateful for all the help.

In turn, Kun would try to cook something he's sure Taeil would like. He held back on the spice because he overheard Taeil saying he doesn't hold spice well.

Sadly, those days were long gone. He's not even sure if Taeil remembers.

So yeah. Out of league. Poor Kun.

* * *

The following day, they are filming again. He's grateful that he doesn't:t have to be within close proximity of Taeil, unlike yesterday. 

"Wow you look like a DILF today!" Yangyang exclaims. Kun shushes him, afraid that someone might hear. "Shut up! Besides, I'm too young to be one!"

Yangyang shrugs. "If you're not a DILF, why be hot and caring?"

"Who's not what?" Both of them turned towards the new voice. 

Taeil is beside them, throwing one arm across Yangyang's shoulders.

"Tell him hyung! Kun is a DILF right?" Yangyang complained.

Kun squirmed a little as Taeil looked up and down, a smirk forming on the older's face. "Of course, he’s a DILF." Taeil patted his cheek before leaving.

He feels like he's about to combust. He hasn't done anything related to being a DILF. He doesn't even have kids yet! How could the apple of his eye, the one who brings fire to his loins, and the unachievable goal tell him that he is a DILF.

He can hear a voice that strangely sounds like Sicheng that maybe Taeil is into him.

If he got the DILF hunter's seal of approval, might as well be proud of it. Or in layman's terms—whipped as hell.

* * *

Here's another thing.

They haven't interacted that much since then. With the only times they were together being From Home rehearsals and filming for NCT World, he doesn't have any reason to talk to Taeil.

Even in practices, he prefers hanging out with Chenle or Yuta. 

It doesn't mean he is prepared for Taeil cornering him during practice. The older approaches while they're on break "Hey, are you free later?" He asks.

"N-no. I mean yes! Yes! I'm free later!" Kun stammers, cheeks growing warm. 

"It’s a date then."

Pause. A date?! Did Taeil just ask him out on a date?! Somewhere in his mind, he heard the Windows shutdown noise.

Why would the coolest, most adorable, and sexiest member of NCT ask him out on a date?! Kun actually thought Taeil actually had a crush on Sicheng for years! 

The smile falls off Taeil's face "I mean, it doesn't have to be one. It can be a friendly hang out."

It’s enough to snap Kun back to reality. "Are you kidding me?! I was here wondering how to ask you out when you decided to ruin my plans and went ahead?! Of course you doofus, I would go on that date with you!"

Taeil's bright grin when Kun kisses him on the cheek is blinding.

Hell yeah, it's a win for the gays!

**Author's Note:**

> kudos/comments are greatly appreciated!
> 
> socials:  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/weishenvtaiyi)  
> [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.qa/adiosnoninos)


End file.
